I’m nearly broken.

I’m on edge. I swear I’m going to explode, burst, break down. I’m almost at my breaking point. I just keep thinking about death. I’m psyching myself out. I keep thinking about the death of my parents. I question if I’m strong enough to go through that. Currently,  I’m questioning my strength. Am I even…

The unexplainable feeling.

I type in the lyrics “And the snow turned into rain.” These lyrics are from Dan Fogelberg’s Same Old Lang Syne, which is a Christmas song. “That” feeling comes over my whole body. The holidays, the cheerfulness, the Christmas tree, the presents, the lights, the weather, the hot chocolate, family gatherings, & the music. When the…

Death, you can no longer run & hide from it.

We sit in the living room discussing newspaper articles that this customer of my father’s has saved. She has a pile sitting in her house from many years back. For the past few years, I’ve been looking on google, yahoo, bing etc to see if I could find something, anything on my cousin Eddie’s tragic…

The whole day we just talked, laughed & smiled.

There were two parts to his birthday presents, a book & a special day with me. The day would consist of driving to Bird-in-Hand, Pennsylvania & riding around on scooters. It would be a refresher from what we normally do. His birthday was on the 5th & since he turned 25 this year, I had…

But, I just can’t start “that.”

There was a surprise party scheduled for him, for his birthday, June 5th. Though, it was planned for the Sunday before it since everyone invited had to work during the week. Excitement ran through my body as I thought about going over there and feeling special in the company of his dad and girlfriend. I…