The above word describes my feelings for the new guy. Just one simple, short word that sums up how I feel about him. I smile. I laugh. I flirt. I giggle. I blush. I talk. I cuddle. I kiss. I hug. I hold. I touch. I squint.
I have fun with him. We’ve been dating for 2 weeks. I’m not one of those girls to mention our 2-week anniversary. Though, I did think about it, but I fought back sharing it with him because it’s not a big deal. Now, when we get to a month on November 22, I will mention it. We won’t buy one another a present for one month. Instead, we will exchange gifts on Christmas. Speaking of, this will be our first Christmas. This is the first Christmas in 3 years that I’m celebrating the holidays with a boyfriend. It’s exciting, invigorating & fun.
I want more of him. On December 12th, it’s my last final at Temple University. I’m not sure when his last one is but that’s it for me. After that, it will begin to get difficult to see one another because our work schedule & the distance. The phone will be used more than usual. We will go from seeing one another every day to possibly once a week. It was be a huge shift, but if we’re both committed & willing to put in time & energy, we can make it. We can do it. I know he’s all in. He’s already told me multiple times, You’re worth it. That’s his words exactly.
The way he hugs me tight. The way he kisses me passionately & slowly. The way he holds my hand with all his fingers. The way he touches me. He’s in. Though I don’t want to put words in his mouth, I know he has strong feelings for me. They. Are. There. They are present. They are sitting right in front me. They are very obvious.
He’s a writer. A thinker. A creator. A dork. A nerd: He’s my writer. My thinker. My creator. My dork. My nerd. Mine. My sweetheart.
Reality is hitting hard that in one month this will all be over. My school career. I’ll have my Bachelor’s Degree. If I take that internship class, I will go back, but if, not there must be a plan B. In the midst of all this end of year work, I must think of my other plan. If I don’t, I’m screwed. I do have to tell you that I’ve been in contact with an editor & recently she’s assigned me an article to write. She needs to tell me more of the specifics, but I’m going to stick with her & maybe she’ll be able to help me, lead me in the right direction. As long as I keep in contact with her, I might be okay. I mean, I can’t just assume that she’ll help me, I just think she could be my “in.”
So, in the middle of all this career planning, I also have a new relationship that needs planning. Planning when to see one another. Planning when to speak on the phone. Planning the special occasions.
On November 22, our one month & Thanksgiving, he’s coming over after work & meeting my two brothers & Pop-Pop. If my grandma is here, he will also meet her as well. [Wish me luck in that department]. I’m excited & happy. I love the holidays either way. But, let’s make Thanksgiving, Christmas & New Years 2012 THE BEST YET!
Sitting here thinking of the way he smiles at me without any words, uses his pointer & pinky finger to symbolize the number 2 and how he mocks me.
We are in the Student Lounge at school, sitting across from one another enjoying our lunch when he starts to stares at me. There are no words that emerge from his mouth. When he smiles, he squints his light brown eyes. What those eyes do to me is indescribable. They get me every time. I become nervous as he continues to stare for about 30 seconds. I start to sweat & feel uncomfortable. I question him, why are you staring at me? with a shrug of my shoulders. He says, You’re cute. He can’t help it, he adds. This day he shares those words two words twice.
On another day, as I’m waiting in the hallway for the previous students to leave the class so I can enter, he walks up to me with a shaved head. Immediately, I cringe. I can be so rude, but there’s no way I could hide my dislike for his hair. He smiles & tells me, I shaved too much off. I continue to look at it with a bit of a disgusted face. But, the packet in his hand overtakes how I feel about his hair. I ask him what he’s holding. Since my power was out for a week due to Hurricane Sandy, he wanted to print out all the pages for our next class assignment & give them to me. He used his own paper. His own ink. He printed it out for me: on his own. Without words. He just did it. I was touched. I swear, in that hallway I would have kissed him, but since there were others standing around, I felt it was inappropriate to PDA! I’m not like that & I don’t think he would have wanted to do it in such proximity of other individuals. He’s my sweetheart.
On this past Sunday, I texted him to let him know I got my power back & to thank him for being such a good boyfriend. When he texted back he wrote, I’m just lucky to have you, dear. He’s a keeper. A winner. A ringer. A hole in one.
There are so many stories I can share with you, but those are the most important ones.
He’s my sweetheart.