One Year Later.

8/31/2014–

Last Day of August. 10 Days since I turned 25. Unofficial last day of summer. A year since I went to the Poconos with my bestie. One year since I claimed that I didn’t need nor want a man. I wanted to be “independent.”

Let’s travel back to a year ago–

 

I just want to learn to rely on myself more.

 

I think I’m ready.

I think I’m ready to embrace the changes in my life. I think I’m ready to face them head on & not be as afraid. I think I’m ready to be grateful & appreciate my surroundings, the good things in life, the good friends and family I have, the special moments that happen.

I saw a coyote today while strolling through the forest with my bestie. We witnessed real, true nature today & it got me thinking. I appreciated it. I got dirty & filthy, but still had a nice time. We spoke about deep thoughts on that long car ride. We divulged some interesting facts about one another, which brought us closer together.

Road trips make you think & you feel so refreshed after the trip.

The past is the past & I thoroughly enjoyed my days of Temple University, but I will also miss this time in my life, this moment in life when I can act silly, fun, careful & single. I can do whatever I want with whomever I want. I don’t need to worry about calling my man to tell him what I’m up to. I don’t need to worry about how much time I spend with my girls while he gets annoyed sitting at home. I don’t need to worry about asking how his day is going or what he’s doing. I don’t need to worry about anyone but myself. Selfish? Maybe, but that’s where I’m at.

I want to stop worrying about a man in order to be happy. I can be happy being single & relying on myself. I want to make myself stronger without a man. I want to become independent & not worry about some guy who will save me from every little thing. I won’t always have that in my life & I need to learn that now. I must lean on myself for support.

In the end, I’m the only one who will be there. Sure, I’ll have friends, but what happens when they simply can’t be there? Then, there’s just little ol’ me. ME. Hope Marie Kumor. She’s the one.

I just want to learn to rely on myself more.

 

Oh, I remember. I remember this day clearly. It was the end of the summer and Jess & I were getting ready for the fall. She was seeing this guy on & off. She was working FT, but hated her job. She was searching for something, but truly didn’t know what it was. She was lost and so was I.

ONE YEAR AGO– I was working at Barnes & Noble as a barista/book seller. I felt like a loser. I was a college graduate and still working in a retail store! I just upset and felt like shit. I was still reeling from my ex-boyfriend. I wanted him back, but what I really missed was knowing someone was there when you needed them. It was a constant and I loved that! I kept reminding myself that I was good on my own. I was good to go. But, for the first time, I really was though. I had so much ahead and didn’t want a guy blocking my way. I wanted an elaborate life filled with jewels, glamor and NEW YORK CITY!! 

I dreamt of New York City and wanted to move there so badly! I wanted NYC and I tried everything I could to make my dream come true. My dreams become a bit closer when I obtained an internship at Family Circle Magazine as a home decor intern. Around that same time, I met a guy. He was special, different and pretty cool. I wasn’t over my ex yet though. I still longed for him and didn’t want Brett.

Isn’t it strange to think about the progress you’ve made in a year? I’ve become more mature, more grown-up, less afraid, more open, smarter, wiser and less naive. I’ve essentially become more in tune with reality. Previously, I was living in a dream state. I wanted this & that & was too hard on myself when it didn’t happen. It takes time. I must be patient. POSITIVE.

Where were YOU one year ago?

The 25th Birthday Celebration!

(Unfortunately!) Yes, I said “unfortunately” I’m 25 years old.

Being 25 means a few things–

1) I’m halfway to 30. (Yippie)

2) I have one more year before my health insurance runs out (Sweet!)

3) I can rent a car. (Big whoop!)

4) I’m now old as dirt.

Even though 25 years old means I’m now in my mid-twenties, I’d say my 25th birthday was pretty damn good!

I spent the day with my man, Brett , which was delightful! We ended up heading up to New Hope, PA to taste some good ol’ fashioned wine at The New Hope Winery. Our original plan was to head to Belmar Beach to get a decent tan (have you seen me lately. #whiteasaghsot), but due to the planned rain and my ladies day (ew), it so wasn’t happening. But, you’ll never guess! It turned out to be a nice day without any rain. Of course that would happen!

We first walked on The Lambertville bridge to take some photos and scope out the beautiful shot!

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(Simply breathtaking, yes?)

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(I loveeee this man so very much! We had to take a #selfie of course).

I’m known for taking several pictures whenever we’re out and about, but then, how else would we document what we do and share some memories? I haveee to!

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(But, then, I stood in two different states & I loved it!)

After our adventure, we headed over to the winery, which was delish! We tried fruit wine such as Cherry Blackberry & Strawberry! We decided that we favor wine over beer. Wine is so much better for you and even has antioxidants! We were feeling it a bit and I told him to snap this photo–

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(25-year-old here)

He even let me take a picture of him as well.

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(Looking all confused there, matey)

We had an awesome time and even toured the wedding venue. It’s crazy to think that Brett & I–almost at 9 months– are speaking about marriage! We want a non-traditional wedding and thought of having it at a winery! It’s uncommon & we both love wine! It’s certainly an idea we’ll keep in the back of our mind. First, we must buy an apartment! That’s our very first step. What happens if we can’t stand living with one another?  We’ll just have to see what happens in the next few months (which is when we’ll move in together! I so cannot wait!)

From there, we walked around Peddler’s Village and went to Cock N Bull. I must tell you one thing though– that restaurant wasn’t the best. I didn’t particularly enjoy the food. Well, you can’t win them all, right?

Later, I particptaed in the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge with the help of him & his brother. It was so lovely! CHECK OUT MY #ALSICEBUCKETCHALLENGE here– https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10204620452613909&l=8225547842465664283.

We finished off the night with some sangria and cuddling. It was one of the best birthdays I’ve had and I’m so happy I found this wonderful man and am so glad he’s in my life. I seriously got so lucky with him! He’s sweet, adorable & very generous!

This awesome man also bought me a GORGEOUS ring, which I L-O-V-E! I love you so much, B!

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24 Years Young.

Tomorrow I turn the Big 2-5. I’ve been thinking, dreading and imagining how I’d spend my 25th birthday, where I’d be living and whether or not I’d have a relationship at this age.

Well, I think I’m in a pretty decent spot. I have to tell you– 24 years old has been the best and worst age by far. 

Worst- Let’s start off with job searching. When I turned 24 years old on August 21, 2013, I was looking for a job. I was unable to find one and along with that, I was extremely confused in the guy department. It had been a few months since I had broken up with Matt and I still missed him. I missed everything about him. But, at the same time, I didn’t want anything to do with men. I was done. I wasn’t sure what was ahead either. I wanted Matt back so badly too!

It was the first fall I hadn’t gone back to school. I was having difficulty dealing with that fact. I swear, I cried. I cried so hard my eyes hurt. I was so lost without Temple University. I didn’t know how to handle anything. I was still working at Barnes & Noble and looking for jobs. I was so utterly depressed between trying to find a job and missing my ex that I was having trouble focusing on other things.

Best- I decided to sign up for a stupid as website, Okcupid.com. I’d go on late at night feeling like total shit. I didn’t tell a soul and just hid behind the screen. On October 6th, I received a message inquiring my passion for health & fitness. Intrigued, I wrote back and began a bond with Brett Evans that I never knew would last this long. I was confused, scared and feared becoming close with another guy. I was so picky and had so many restrictions I told Brett not to do. “Don’t touch me too much. Don’t do this- don’t do that.” He stood by me and agreed not to do what my ex-boyfriend did. But, even still, I wasn’t ready for a relationship and placed him into the friend zone. I was so frightened. It was me. I was scared of myself though.

(I met this amazing man on October 6, 2013. Check out our story here.)

Around the same time, I obtained an internship at Family Circle Magazine. So, from October-April, I traveled to NYC in order to fulfill my dream of becoming a magazine writer! Every Tuesday & Thursday I’d work 10-5:30 and babysit on the side. It didn’t earn me much money, but Brett stood by me. Even when I placed him in the friend zone, he still helped me through a rough period. I dealt with my issues and emotions and brought him back into my life as I interned in the Home Decor Department at FC Magazine.

I was thrilled, happy, excited & energetic when it came to heading to NYC. However, Brett wasn’t so happy because it wasn’t able to pocket any money.

As soon as I obtained my glorious internship in October 2013, I began job searching. I wanted to be prepared earlier than ever just in case. I swear, I looked from November-April and nothing. It didn’t get me anywhere. Sure, I made a bunch of connections and I’ll never forget my wonderful experience either!

I couldn’t find anything. My job search failed while my relationship thrived. I was so depressed. I applied to so many jobs, but it never got me anywhere. I worked as a waitress and barista until I obtained a full-time job.

It took me long enough! Finally, in July 2014, I received a phone call about a content writer job at 1seo.com and I was so thrilled!

But, 24 years old was really rough for me! Let’s hope 25 is better!

I must say though– I have a good job, great friends & family, superb boyfriend and overall decent life, so I can’t really complain!

Anyway, see ya later 24 years old! 25 here I come.

(Yup, that’s me on August 21, 2014!)

I had the time of my life!!

AUGUST 16, 2014–

This was a perfect day. Brett’s sister Emily was getting married. She looked absolutely stunning! Check out more pictures here.

My day started off sour though when my makeup artist felt sick and cancelled on me. I was all out of sorts while I was over B’s house. He started to get ready as I figured out how I’d get my makeup/hair done. I was baffled. I decided to call the same studio he went to since he had $10.00 off. (Studio B) Why not? Luckily, they had a 10:30 appointment and it was around 9:45. I left his place around 10:15 a.m. I wouldn’t see him until the ceremony. I was riding with his bestie.

My hair took about an hour, but turned out so beautiful! See it below.

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Next was my makeup. I decided to do it myself. It took me about a half an hour.

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(How do I look??)

Then, I waited for his bestie to come and pick me up. He arrived around 1:15 and we were off. It took us about an hour to get to St. Joseph in Aston, PA. Honestly, I couldn’t wait to see my man. I knew I’d hardly to get spend time with him, so when I did, I was thrilled & excited. I’d see him for the first time in a suit & tie. I couldn’t believe how cute he looked!

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(Doesn’t he look soooo handsome? I think so!)

The ceremony lasted about 30 minutes and then the reception was planned for 6:00 at Valley Forge Casino Resort in King of Prussia! Therefore, we’d need to stall and look for something to do for a couple of hours. Brett had to go off with the wedding party and take photos at Valley Forge Park, which was nearby. Him & I previously went there for our 6-month anniversary and we thought it was beautiful & gorgeous!

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(How adorable is this photo they took at the Valley Forge Park??)

While they were taking photos, his bestie & I were hanging out at Valley Forge Casino perusing the place. It was ELEGANT & BEAUTIFUL.

Honestly, I kept looking at the time. I just wanted to see my man again. I just wanted to hug, cuddle & kiss him. I believe I’m beginning to get really attached to him. It’s terrible. I promised myself I would not, but it’s beginning to happen (unfortunately). It blows like you wouldn’t believe. I cannot fully rely on him!

Eventually, they arrived and Justin & I had to get presents out of his car. The boys showed up wearing top hats. They looked so cute, especially my man!

We all celebrated Emily & Jesse! I was thrilled to share this special moment with him and his family. I even felt part of the family and that’s a great feeling.

I hung out with him after we eat. I just wanted to be with him. I didn’t care about anything else. I wanted to take some photos with the bride, but regretfully, I didn’t. I know it’s thatttt big of a deal, but I seriously regret it. What can you do?

Someone took a photo of me taking a picture of my man & I.

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(Can you say #classiccccc #forrealssss #justsayinn??)

This photo would be taken! #ofcourse

We had a ball! SHOCKING FACT! He actually danced with him. I was begging him to dance a little bit with him. He said he doesn’t like to dance, he doesn’t feel comfortable, blah-blah-blah, but guess what? He stayed on the dance floor after we slow danced and I was one proud girlfriend. I felt so happy, excited & thrilled that whole evening. We all had tons of fun and I would re-live it in one second.

There was even a photo booth where you were able to take pictures, which was super cool & fun!

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(B & I)

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(The girls & I)

We had such a blast! We got home really, really late too! I just wanted to stay & cuddle with him. Is it wrong to just want to be with my man? I mean, I never ever get to spend time with him. Like ever.  Everyone else, besides my man & I booked the hotel. We didn’t in order to save money. In a matter of a few months, we’re moving into an apartment together, plus in about 2 weeks, we’re heading to Las Vegas!! Arghhhh!

Anywho, I love weddings! I couldn’t help but picture my wedding. My dad walks me down the aisle while my mom watches us balling her eyes out as her only daughter is given away to an amazing & incredible man. Later on, my dad & I will slow dance to a song I’ve chosen for the two of us. I can picture it, I swear. It’s nuts & insane! I’m so excited!

Until next time!!

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Please & Thank you!

xoxox

Hope Kumor.

My Daily Scoop.

APARTMENT.

Our Apartment Hunt is finally complete. We’ve decided on Village of Pennbrook. We are so absolutely & wonderfully happy that we no longer need to search, look. browse the web for apartments. We carefully chose the apartment. It was not a rash decision. Instead, we took our time and researched before jumping into anything.

November 2014 we will move in together. Just thinking about it excites me. It will be him & I concurring the world together. I’ll come home to him and I’ll absolutely love every single second of it. I know it will whip by.

WEDDING.

This Saturday, it’s my boyfriend’s sister’s wedding. I am more excited than he is because I LOVE WEDDINGS! I can’t get enough of them. From the planning, picking of bridesmaids, and the actual day. I cannot wait until my wedding! I am utterly and completely ready for that– not money wise though. Weddings are not cheap! Either way, I’m stoked! Don’t worry, I’ll take PLENTY of photos for you to look through!

I always watch engagements and am extremely jealous. Next Thursday, I turn 25 years old. I’ll be 5 years away from 30. #holyhell

In January, I was in a wedding for my girl Jamie.

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(The bride & I at her January 2014 wedding)

But, in my adult years, I haven’t been to a wedding until now. My man is a groomsman and will look ABSOLUTELY handsome. I’ll love seeing him up there standing next to the groom. But, unfortunately, he has to slow dance with his cousin, which he’s so not looking forward to. I’ll be heading there with Justin, his bestie. I won’t get to spend too much time with my man though. I’ll just hang with J. No worries. It will be a good ol’ time.

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(I’ll be taking another one of these, but in another dress and him in a suit & tie)

Saturday cannot come fast enough! It will pass by in a flash though. I just know it!

Follow me to check out my pictures from the wedding on Instagram. Facebook. Twitter.

Oh happy day!

A whole year can really make a difference!

AUGUST 2, 2014

K.

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(Summer 2013. Let’s go back just for tonight to reflect.)

I was single, missing Temple, depressed, up & down, job searching, a brand new college graduate & looking for a relationship. June-July, I was hungry for a guy. I wanted, yearned & needed a guy to feel complete. I wanted someone who I could turn to whenever I was sad. My bestie, Jess & I went through the same thing. We both wanted a man. We went out a ton and signed up for dating websites to fill that void. But, nothing was ever enough. I just broke up with my boyfriend a few months back and was having difficulty getting over him.

AUGUST 18TH, 2013–

Because I don’t really like when guys touch me.

I don’t really like the physical contact as much. And, I don’t really want to get physical. It feels like a task, a chore. Does that make any sense?!

To think of myself now is crazy! My boyfriend is extremely affectionate & I love it. How strange is that? A year ago, I couldn’t stand when guys were all over me. It annoyed the living shit out of me and now, I just love when my boyfriend pulls me in to cuddle with him. In fact, I LOVE cuddling & being close to him. I look forward to it. If it were up to me, I’d cuddle with him every day, every hour, every minute. Um. I so wasn’t like that before. Ask anyone & they will tell you how I used to be.

I was reading through some entries of August 2013. On August 6th, I felt as if something good was coming. I mean, I KNEW something was going to happen. Did I predict a relationship brewing? Did I know somehow?

August 6th, 2013–

 It’s coming. I feel it. I taste it. I smell it. I can’t tell you what it is or describe it, but something is coming up.

I had no clue what 2014 would bring.

Last summer, periodically, I would sit in my room most nights & do nothing. I was bored out of my freekin mind. I can’t even think what I used to do before Brett! How crazy is it to think of yourself a year ago? Who was I? What was I doing? What was I thinking? Where was I going? Who was I hanging out with? Speaking to? Feeling? Imagining?

I was sad, lonely & depressed. I was 24 & obsessed with finding a man to fill the void.

The bestie & I were getting ready to hit the town looking hot as shit. We put on loads of makeup ready to meet guys. I drove us to 700 club. The smell of alcohol hit my nose & lite up my senses. We drank one beer each & danced. We were single gals looking for a good time. We spoke with some guys, who grinded with us. We never met them, but danced the night away. Even though I so wasn’t feeling him, I still gave him my number at the end of the night. Whatever, I thought. I did it for fun. He texted me, but I just wasn’t interested. Nah. No. Whatever.

Now, a year later, I’m with Brett. In two weeks, his sister will get married. I’ll be part of her celebration & I cannot wait. I’m stoked, excited & looking forward to it! Sweet. Awesome. Stellar. Excited.

Just think, a whole year can really make a difference!