Last March, my then-boyfriend, now fiancé, and I decided to move to another state. Now, keep in mind, we never lived away from home and it was 800+ miles away. So, again, we wouldn’t know anyone and planned to re-build our lives. We would be in a different environment and I knew there would be tons to learn.
Not only did we have to learn to work together, I personally needed to grow as a person. I feared being a grown-up and it crippled me. But, my then-boyfriend was always there to reassure me that growing up was nothing to be afraid of because well, it has to happen at some point in your life. And, at 25, it needed to occur ASAP.
But, unfortunately, my fear took over and I refused to do so and fought with it- or rather- fought with my boyfriend. In the first few months, we did nothing but argue and it was absolutely horrible. It was pretty sad when we got our dog, Ollie and I was jealous of him because it seemed as if my boyfriend was giving him more attention that myself. But, it was not that at all because that sounds absolutely absurd. It was all in my head and I needed to take a hard look at myself and ask why I was acting this way.
See, I’m smart enough to recognize when I’m acting in an immature way. I stop and ask myself why and from there, I learn from my mistakes. And, the truth was, being that far from my family was very hard. I did not think about the ’emotional’ side of things because I knew it might prevent me from going. I knew I needed a change as well as him and figured ‘this’ was IT.
I just had such a hard time adjusting to this new life. I had lived in PA my whole time and in a day, that changed. But, it’s not like I had to do it, it was a decision we mutually agreed upon. I just had to accept the harsh reality that I was no longer a kid. I had responsibilities, bills to pay, people to take care of, etc. And, it was time to stop being so damn afraid to be an adult. My parents have always made decisions for me and having to make them for myself was terrifying. Again, it was time to start deciding what to do for myself.
I also learned how to care for another living creature, that being a dog. At first, I did not want the responsibility, but in the end, I learned so much from the experience and now love him to pieces. And, in October, when my boyfriend had surgery and got sick, I was there to care for him. The ‘old’ me probably wouldn’t have been able to handle it and that’s the sad, but I had to prove something to myself as well as him. To me, I needed to prove that I will be a good mom, good partner and be there when times are rough. And, I passed with flying colors!
So, despite the first few months being extremely rough and hard, I learned so much and would not take it back for the world. I’ve become more mature, have grown as a person as well as a wonderful companion to my fiancé.