15 Things On What Being In Love Means

Love is more than getting a dog and watching Netflix together.

  • While spending time is important, you must also spend time apart so you have a chance to miss your partner.
  • Love means sacrificing what you want to do for what they want to do.
  • Love means buying a gift for them when you see something at the store that reminds you of them.
  • Love means accepting their flaws.
  • Love means supporting them through thick and thin.
  • Love means waiting for their phone call to let you know they got there when they’re out of town.
  • Love means popping their pimples when they ask you to – even if you think it’s gross.
  • Love means waking up before they do and making breakfast.
  • Love means saving the last yogurt for them because you know they love that flavor.
  • Love means giving them a deep tissue massage even if you’re exhausted.
  • Love means communicating, compromising and coming to an agreement for the harder decisions in life.
  • Love means letting her lay on your chest even if you’re physically and mentally drained.
  • Love means planning the wedding she wants instead of what you desire.
  • Love means earning enough funds so you two can move far away because she’s always liked to live in the south.
  • Love means constantly reminding them how much they mean to you, how much you care for them.

There’s more to love than kisses, hugs and sex. It’s not always rainbows and butterflies. It can be hard work, but if you really love each other, it should be a breeze!

10 Ways to Say ‘I Do’ Without Going Bankrupt

When my then-boyfriend asked for my hand in marriage November 2015, we were both full-time employees living in Tennessee.

Not only were we living on our own, we now had to pay for a wedding. So, before we began planning, we sat down and set a budget of $15,000. Knowing the average was about $35,329, according to Fortune.com, we planned to spend half of that!

But, then, four months later, life got turned upside down when we had to move back home.

My then-fiancé lost his job and I had to find another job because I knew working remotely would be a bit too difficult.

His parents and my parents told us they’d pitch in, but in reality, we wanted to do this on our own.  Regardless, we appreciated everything they gave us.

We also knew realistically we were unable to do so because of our job situations.

We budgeted and did the best we could to save money and not overspend. We created a budget sheet on excel to track our spending.

I wanted a beautiful wedding, but I also didn’t anticipate having to pay — for instance — the caterer a whopping $3,000 for their services. If you don’t know already, weddings are expensive. However, they do not have to be – if you budget for them or go for a cheaper route.

My husband wanted to elope, but I refused because I wanted my dad to walk me down the aisle, dance with me and have the DJ play a song my husband and I could dance to.

So, if you’re smart about it, your wedding can cost less than a mortgage. In the end, ours was around $15,000 and now, the average cost of a wedding is 35,329! So, we spent less than 53% of the average wedding!

Here are some tips on how to dish out less dough:

  • Make DIY your BFF. Instead of buying the décor, make it from scratch. My husband and I scoped Pinterest and found loads of décor for weddings!
  • Don’t invite Aunt what’s her face. Here’s my rule of thumb, if you haven’t talked in the last two years, heck within the last year, these people do not deserve to be invited.
  • Send out Save the dates via email. I was told by a friend who got married that people throw away save the dates. So, if you are going to, send it via email.
  • Choose an inexpensive venue. My husband and I chose a $4,000 venue. I’m sure there are way cheaper venues, but we wanted a rustic wedding, so we chose an old manor. Just do your research!
  • Make your own bouquets. Flowers are expensive. However, they don’t have to be if you don’t get them. So, be sure to opt for something besides flowers.
  • Plan the wedding and reception at one location. Don’t make your guests flock to two different locations. It’s also way easier on the bridal party who doesn’t have to spend time in a car riding to the other location.
  • Your dress doesn’t have to cost an arm and a leg. I set a budget for my dress to be $400-$500. Trust me; it is possible to find a beautiful dress for that amount.
  • Opt for less expensive food dishes. You don’t need caviar and shrimp. Go for something simpler and less likely to break your bank.
  • Choose cupcakes instead of cake. Our cake was around $300 and that was the cheapest we found. However, I’m sure cupcakes are just as delicious and less costly.
  • You don’t need too much food. You don’t need fondue, dessert bar, smores bar and an open bar. Just one dessert option will suffice.
 Via Puckermob

You Can Never Be Prepared For A Loved One To Pass Away

I don’t think I’m going to be able to walk into a nursing home for a while.

It’s just too painful for me and evokes too many memories. I don’t like to think of memories because then I’ll get sad and the waterworks will start. I’m afraid that once I start crying, I won’t be able to stop.

My grandmother passed away on March 10th.

My first thought was I  feel bad for dad because he just lost his mom. On the day of the funeral, I watched him sit there with a stone cold look on his face while he stared at my grandmother’s body. I knew he was weeping on the inside, but he just didn’t want to display his emotions.

I’ve only seen my father cry once in my life and that was when my cousin Eddie passed away. I was sure this would be the second time, but he didn’t show us. He hid it until no one was looking.

After all of us said our goodbyes, the minister shut the door with my mother and father in the room. I remember watching my father’s face and feeling horrible. My mother was always there for us when my dad wasn’t, she always supported us, my dad would tell me.

I wish I was better at comforting people because I would have hugged my dad really tight and told him everything was going to be alright.

Instead, I stood there for a second before getting into the car to head to the church. I couldn’t move, though, so I just stared at the door he just closed.

In reality, the sight of anyone crying would have set me off because I was going through an emotional rollercoaster between moving and my grandma passing away.

Growing up, I was never really close with my grandma.

It’s not to say I wasn’t sad when she passed, but my brothers and I never saw her that often. She babysat us a few times and came to all of our parties as well as a few of my recitals, but I don’t have specific memories of her.

I know my cousins were closer to her and they might have been feeling the loss a little greater than my brothers and me.

But, in general, you can never really be prepared for a loved one to die. How can you really prepare your mind for that? It’s hard to let go of someone you love and someone who has supported you through thick and thin. But, you need to let them go, though. You need to focus on the positive – like they’re no longer suffering. That’s what I try to tell my dad time and time again, but I know there’s nothing I can say or do to make him feel better.

In the end, I know he’ll be okay and that’s all that matters.

Via Puckermob

Here’s Hoping I Can Keep My Emotions Together

I’m in Greenville and I’m at Walmart picking out the curtains and garbage bags for our new apartment. I’m in my own world as I take a look around the store.

My dad calls me, but doesn’t leave a message while I’m chatting away with my husband about shower curtains.

I know that if my dad called me, the conversation wasn’t going to be a good one, especially since he doesn’t leave a message.

I nervously dial his number and wait for him to answer.

When he doesn’t, I breathe a sigh of relief because maybe just maybe he accidently dialed my number. I think, maybe it was a butt dial.

Then, a minute later, my phone rings.

He clears his throat before telling me my grandma has stopped eating. “She didn’t eat this morning or this afternoon. I’m thinking maybe tonight or tomorrow.”

My husband and I were set to move to Greenville on March 13th. We’d arranged the truck rental, our belongings and we were ready to leave PA. But, when I got that call, it changed everything.

“Okay, well, I’m going to have to stay and Brett has to go with his parents,” I said.

It was the only option.

When I got off the phone, I felt sad for my dad. His mom is dying and he must be devastated. Sure, it was bound to happen, but I figured it would be at least another year down the road. And, what great timing it was to occur.

The next day, my mom sent a text around 2 saying that grandma passed.

I felt pretty down that day for some reason. I was in North Carolina waiting for my husband to take a break from class and eat lunch with me.

I laid down across my front and passenger seats telling myself not to get upset, don’t let my emotions get the best of me. I kept repeating the same thing over and over to myself. I haven’t thought much about my emotions because I fear I won’t be able to control myself.

The plan was his parents had to bring the enterprise truck back in PA – near my parents house – so I drove back with them to attend the funeral. So, his folks generously drove down with us, helped us arrange everything and left two days later to continue their lives.

Gosh, I’m trying to be strong and not lose it. I just hope I have the strength to keep it together because I feel my throat tightening.

Making A Change In Your Life Isn’t Always A Bad Thing

I’m sitting in the clubhouse at my new apartment in Greenville.

Instead of thinking about the emotional stress I’m about to endure when we officially move, I’m focusing on finding a job, my new life with my husband, hanging out with our friends who live here and making memories.

If I were to think about how I won’t see my family or friends for a long time, it would do nothing but make me sad.

Here’s my advice to you: don’t fear change.

Change is hard, but instead of dwelling on the negatives, you should think about why you made the decision in the first place or why the decision was presented in front of your face. You must think to yourself, maybe this meant to be.

My husband and I came to Greenville last April for an engagement shoot one of my friends offered to do for us. We loved the area, but didn’t think much into it. We were going through a hard time at that point because he was about to lose my job and we had to move back home.

I know that I had a very difficult time grasping the fact that we needed to move back home until our wedding. But, then, we re-visited the option of Greenville in January again.

After discussing it and him getting an interview in Asheville to become a home inspector, we finally decided to take the leap and move here. We wanted to meet in the middle for a place to live and Greenville was it!

Now, we took a chance because he’s still going for his certificate and I do not have a job here – yet.

But, something told me it was okay. Something told me that I had to take this risk because well, I think it’s meant to be. I know I’ll find something eventually. Not to mention, it’s a great opportunity for him and whenever he talks about it, he lights up.

Nothing matters to me more than when my husband is happy. If he’s happy, I’m happy. And, that’s part of marriage. You need to make changes to benefit your partner. You need to sacrifice in order to help your partner out.

So, here we are, in Greenville.

Via Puckermob

10 Things Never To Say To Someone Whose Been Dumped

“My boyfriend broke up with me – on Valentine’s Day,” my co-worker divulged to me.

My response was what a dick. When she explained how he just wasn’t ready for a relationship, my next instinct was to say something like, “he probably wasn’t the guy for you.” But, I didn’t because I remember when I got dumped. There are some things you just don’t say to someone whose been dumped.

  • There are plenty more fish in the sea. This is a phrase you do not want to hear this because well, it doesn’t make the break-up any better. While there are plenty more men out there, there are some things you keep to yourself.
  • It will get better. Eventually, the pain will subside, but again, if you just got dumped, hearing this will not make the situation better.
  • Give it time. Ugh, or maybe he’ll come around, right? Sorry, but if you’ve been broken up with, it was for a reason. Please stop talking, okay?
  • You deserve better. Okay, this isn’t always true. There are some cases where maybe he thought he was ready, but he really weren’t. If he was respectful and told you the truth, this phrase doesn’t need to be said.
  • Guys suck! Well, not all guys suck. While some guys are assholes, this does not pertain to all guys, so please retract this statement.
  • Join tinder! If you’re looking for a booty call – after you’ve been dumped – sure, try Tinder. But, this isn’t the best advice to take considering you probably don’t want to date for a long, long time.
  • He’ll regret it. Maybe, or maybe not? You’ll never know, but just try to focus on other activities instead.
  • It wasn’t meant to be. For goodness sake, you don’t know that, so why say it? Maybe he just wasn’t ready.
  • Hang in there! Yeah, I’ll be sure to note that on my calendar.
  • I never liked him anyway. Really? Did you really know him enough to make that assumption? Ugh, please stop.

Sorry, But Eating Healthy Doesn’t Make Me Weird

I’d rather eat food I made myself rather than a processed piece of shit that will mess up my stomach. I have a sensitive belly and when consumed the wrong food, the repercussions can ruin my day.

I’ve been to the gastroenterologist loads of times and the doctor suggested cutting out meat to see if it helped with my digestion. I never tried doing that because I feared I couldn’t stay away from hamburgers, especially. But, when my husband and I went on a cruise for our honeymoon and met with a nutritionist, he told me to do the same.

So, I did.

The nutritionist told me to stop eating processed foods and avoid food with animals that have four legs. He also provided us with a list of foods not to eat. This time I complied because I needed a change. My husband did the same and we waited a month to see how we felt.

To my surprise, my stomach actually did improve. I stopped feeling like utter shit after I consumed cheese or dairy products. I began to stick to a healthy diet and cut out foods with ingredients that I cannot pronounce.

And, here’s the thing: eating healthy does not make me weird. I’d much prefer a salad over a fried chicken sandwich with mounds of cheese. Not to mention, how many calories is that?

Whenever someone offers me something at work, if I don’t look at the ingredients and know it’s processed, I politely decline. However, I know what they’re thinking. They think I’m strange because who doesn’t like chocolate or muffins or heck, tater tots?

What they don’t know is I must look at every single label when I’m about to eat something or make sure it doesn’t have acid in it.

However, there is such a thing as cheat day, which is one day out of the week where I consume whatever I want. But, then, I get back to my healthy eating habits.

But, let me tell you something, most of the population is unhealthy and probably have several cheat days in a row. 

We walk around not knowing we have toxins in our bodies. This could eventually lead to cancer or other diseases, but no one knows it. We all just go about our day choosing foods that are extremely unhealthy because they look appetizing.

We’re so busy that we pick up fast food or purchase frozen foods. But, really, if we took the time to think about how bad this stuff is for us, we’d avoid it like the plague!

Let me ask a question: If a nutritionist told us to start looking at labels and watching calories, would we? Sadly, no.

As a general population, it’s hard to stop eating fries, fried food and foods that make us gain weight because it makes us feel good. But, I’m done with all that shit because it makes me feel horrible after I eat it.

I hate people looking at me like I have 4 eyes because I look at labels or opt for a healthy lunch. It doesn’t make me weird! Maybe I don’t want to get cancer or any other illnesses because I’m not concerned with watching what I’m putting in my mouth.

Just think about it.

Via Puckermob

Goodbye To The “Friends” I Left Behind In 2016

In 2016, I lost two of my best friends.

It wasn’t my fault either. Rather, it was both of them who to pushed me away subtly.

The first one probably hurt more the other because I truly thought we had something good. She was the one I relied on while living in another state. She was the one who sought advice from, leaned on when I needed someone to talk to and hung out with when I wanted “girl time.”

She punched me in the gut without even knowing it.

She hasn’t kept in touch with me and obviously, this is an indication that we never really were friends. I mean, I told her some deep and serious shit and she returned the favor. But, then, when I was gone she stabbed me in the back. This begs the question of: was she ever really my friend?

The second was someone I knew since 5th grade.

This one didn’t hurt as much because we haven’t been that close for a while. But, she was my maid of honor, so she was definitely an important part of my life. She was the one that never judged me. She was the one I could literally talk to about anything. She never questioned my decisions or even said much when it probably was downright nuts.

But, I knew that wasn’t her talking because she had changed since she’d been dating her now-fiancé.

It hurt though when she was adding unnecessary stress to what was set to be one of the best days of my life. She argued with stuff I asked of her and when I wanted her to do certain duties, she never came through. I was frustrated, but I never voiced it to her because I knew it was cause more drama.

So, I kept my mouth shut.

Then, she got annoyed with a detail I neglected to tell her. That was the last straw, so I asked her not to come to my wedding. I was pretty upset that along the way she caused such issues. That was supposed to be one of my best friends.

Both friendships were supposed to last, but I guess things don’t always work out the way you’d like them to. I got hurt in 2016, but now that it’s 2017, I’m starting over. Therefore, I’m going to be a bit more cautious and watch whose got my back.

Via Puckermob

I Hope He Still Gives Me That Look Even When I’m Old And Gray

The man I love is lying at the end of the bed watching one of his favorite shows. He strokes his hair and squints at the screen.

“Put on your glasses, you keep squinting your eyes,” I say as I hand him his glasses. He smiles at me nonchalantly.

I stare at him for a few more minutes before I return back to writing. His back is facing me, so he doesn’t see me staring in his direction. I take a few more moments to look at the man I just married.

We’ve been married for almost 2 months. We’ve been together for over 3 years and we didn’t meet the conventional way, rather we met online.

I was against online dating and refused to try it, until my best friend convinced me. Long story short, I met my husband online and I don’t regret giving into something I wasn’t comfortable with doing.

I thank my best friend quite often for pushing me to create a profile on Okcupid. She was the one who told me it was okay to pursue online dating.

“It’s fun, trust me,” she said.

And, she was right.


“Will you always give me that look?” I ask my husband.

He smiles and says, “yes, of course.”

I just want to remember this moment before everything gets crazy, before kids come into the picture, before we purchase our first house, before we get old, before it’s the end of just the two of us.

“I’m scared that our love with change,” I say. “It may change, but I’ll always love you,” he responses with.

I just want him to always push the hair out of eyes, stroke my hair, hold me tight and cuddle me when I need it and most of all, love me after I’m pregnant. These are just fears of mine though.

Deep down, I know he will, but there’s always a part of me that’s scared of the changes that will happen in the years to come.

Even when I’m old and gray, I’m hoping he’ll love me just the same!

He kisses me on the forehead and hugs me tight. I never want him to stop doing that even when we have kids or even when my body changes.

We’re just starting our lives together and there will be lots of stuff we’re going to endure. But, at the end of the day, supporting each other will become a crucial part of our lives and I know we’ll be able to be there for each other no matter what!

Via Puckermob

Please Stop Saying Prince Charming Is Right Around The Corner

When I was single, I was so sick of people saying, “oh, it’s just not meant to be.”

I’d cringe every time I’d hear someone mumble those damn words.

I understand they were trying to make me feel better, but I just wanted to say shut the f**k up!

It never made me feel at ease. It just annoyed me and made me want to slap them.

It’s funny that I bring this up because I’ve caught myself saying this phrase to my single friends. But, sometimes, I just don’t know what to say. 

I mean, in my heart I know my girls will find the right guy, but I just don’t know when that will be.

Here’s the thing: when I met my husband, I wasn’t looking for a relationship. In fact, I didn’t want to have anything to do with men. I was so tired of dating guys, so I focused on my career instead. But, then, one day, Brett came along and the rest is history.

So, this is the advice I can give you: it will happen when you least expect it because well, life is so unpredictable and you cannot predict when the right guy will come along.

But, for those who are telling girls that prince charming is right around the corner, please stop unless you have like a crystal ball. If you can, in fact, see the future then I’ll allow you to say that phrase and tell me what’s ahead because I’d sure as hell like to know!

There’s also one thing you must remember: even though you crave a guy to take care of you, there are pros to being single.

You get plenty alone time to focus on hobbies, writing, crafts and hanging with friends.  Also, you don’t have to worry about checking in with your guy or getting to know his friends. And, I’m sure there are other things but I’m just going to leave you with the two most important!

Just keep those pros in mind late at night when you want to cuddle with someone.

It’s natural to want to be with someone because we all want to be loved, but unfortunately the more you want something, it never really happens. It usually occurs when you don’t care or aren’t looking for a boyfriend.

And, that’s not bullshit, it really does normally happen like that.

I just want people to stop feeding you lines because they’d like to make you feel better because it doesn’t help or work!

Just tell me to focus on my own stuff and then at some point the guy I’m destined to be with will walk by.

Via Puckermob