15 Things On What Being In Love Means

Love is more than getting a dog and watching Netflix together.

  • While spending time is important, you must also spend time apart so you have a chance to miss your partner.
  • Love means sacrificing what you want to do for what they want to do.
  • Love means buying a gift for them when you see something at the store that reminds you of them.
  • Love means accepting their flaws.
  • Love means supporting them through thick and thin.
  • Love means waiting for their phone call to let you know they got there when they’re out of town.
  • Love means popping their pimples when they ask you to – even if you think it’s gross.
  • Love means waking up before they do and making breakfast.
  • Love means saving the last yogurt for them because you know they love that flavor.
  • Love means giving them a deep tissue massage even if you’re exhausted.
  • Love means communicating, compromising and coming to an agreement for the harder decisions in life.
  • Love means letting her lay on your chest even if you’re physically and mentally drained.
  • Love means planning the wedding she wants instead of what you desire.
  • Love means earning enough funds so you two can move far away because she’s always liked to live in the south.
  • Love means constantly reminding them how much they mean to you, how much you care for them.

There’s more to love than kisses, hugs and sex. It’s not always rainbows and butterflies. It can be hard work, but if you really love each other, it should be a breeze!

I’m Going To Do Everything I Can To Have An Above Average Marriage

“I want us to say one thing we love about each other on our date nights,” I said to my husband last night.

He scuffed and said, “but, I don’t need to hear that stuff because I already know by the way you look at me.” I couldn’t argue that because my heart jumps whenever I see him working on a project; whenever he’s playing with Ollie; heck, even when he’s making dinner.

These are actions, not words.

I used to think I was meant to be with a sensitive guy, a guy who was a writer, who cried and talked about his emotions all the time. But, I keep forgetting that I actually was with a guy that like and he irked me.

He constantly needed to show his affection, but in reality, I think it was a ploy to get me to sleep with him.

It’s safe to say after 6 months, I was done.

As for my husband and I, our relationship hasn’t been typical and normal, so why should our marriage? I want an above average marriage where we can just look into each other’s eyes and not have to say a word.

I mean, we met online, hung out sparingly due to his job, lived with his parents for a few months, moved to Tennessee, back to PA, then shared an apartment with his folks and now, we’re in Greenville. I’d say that doesn’t sound like an average marriage.

He’s anti-social, but shows that he cares by helping people at the drop of a hat, while I’d rather show I care by checking in to see how people are doing. He’s quiet and keeps to himself while I like hanging out with people. However, I am quiet too, so that’s definitely where we meet in the middle.

We play fight, “insult” each other while on the other end, we kiss, make love, hold hands and go out on date nights. We are best friends, yet lovers. We bicker, argue about petty shit.

It’s usually me who starts it, but I do it because he pisses me off so badly. But, I love him. I love him with all my heart and miss him whenever he’s away.

I wish he’d change and he wishes I would too, but we’re human and we’ve been this way most of our lives, so never fully change. And, if they do, they just end up coming full circle.

I don’t need any books or anything to tell me how I feel about him. His logic level is above average and whenever we get into arguments, he wins most of the time because I have nothing else to say. He articulates himself very well and I’m stuck stumbling on my own words.

He makes me a better person and I make him a better human being.

I don’t need that mushy gushy shit all the time and neither does he. I don’t always need him to tell him how he feels about me because I already know. I can tell by his actions and how he brushes the hair out of my eyes, how he cleans out the corners of my eyes in the morning, how he grabs me, pulls me on top of him and just puts his arms around me tightly.

“You need to have more confidence,” he says while he guzzles a cup of water. “You need to believe that you’re good enough for the position. You need to show them that you’re the right fit.”

He tries to boost my confidence by telling me my strengths as I job search.

He’s supportive, listens and just wants me to build up enough confidence to believe in myself.

No one is perfect. No marriage is perfect.

Everyone has flaws. It’s just about how to accept them. If I want an above average marriage, I need to start accepting his flaws like he accepts mine.

“It’s just not fair that you keep picking on my flaws, but I don’t have any issues with yours,” he says. It’s not fair.

There’s too much bullshit in life to fight about flaws. There’s too much going on in our lives between trying to find jobs, planning for children within the next few years, maintaining a relationship with each other, family, dog and friends.

He was the first one who got this thought into my mind that we should have an above average marriage.

My first thought was whatever – yeah, I can be a bitch sometimes. But, then, I really started thinking about it and now, I want the same thing and I’m going to fight like hell to maintain it because I love this man with all my heart and I know he feels the same.

Via Huffington Post

10 Ways to Say ‘I Do’ Without Going Bankrupt

When my then-boyfriend asked for my hand in marriage November 2015, we were both full-time employees living in Tennessee.

Not only were we living on our own, we now had to pay for a wedding. So, before we began planning, we sat down and set a budget of $15,000. Knowing the average was about $35,329, according to Fortune.com, we planned to spend half of that!

But, then, four months later, life got turned upside down when we had to move back home.

My then-fiancé lost his job and I had to find another job because I knew working remotely would be a bit too difficult.

His parents and my parents told us they’d pitch in, but in reality, we wanted to do this on our own.  Regardless, we appreciated everything they gave us.

We also knew realistically we were unable to do so because of our job situations.

We budgeted and did the best we could to save money and not overspend. We created a budget sheet on excel to track our spending.

I wanted a beautiful wedding, but I also didn’t anticipate having to pay — for instance — the caterer a whopping $3,000 for their services. If you don’t know already, weddings are expensive. However, they do not have to be – if you budget for them or go for a cheaper route.

My husband wanted to elope, but I refused because I wanted my dad to walk me down the aisle, dance with me and have the DJ play a song my husband and I could dance to.

So, if you’re smart about it, your wedding can cost less than a mortgage. In the end, ours was around $15,000 and now, the average cost of a wedding is 35,329! So, we spent less than 53% of the average wedding!

Here are some tips on how to dish out less dough:

  • Make DIY your BFF. Instead of buying the décor, make it from scratch. My husband and I scoped Pinterest and found loads of décor for weddings!
  • Don’t invite Aunt what’s her face. Here’s my rule of thumb, if you haven’t talked in the last two years, heck within the last year, these people do not deserve to be invited.
  • Send out Save the dates via email. I was told by a friend who got married that people throw away save the dates. So, if you are going to, send it via email.
  • Choose an inexpensive venue. My husband and I chose a $4,000 venue. I’m sure there are way cheaper venues, but we wanted a rustic wedding, so we chose an old manor. Just do your research!
  • Make your own bouquets. Flowers are expensive. However, they don’t have to be if you don’t get them. So, be sure to opt for something besides flowers.
  • Plan the wedding and reception at one location. Don’t make your guests flock to two different locations. It’s also way easier on the bridal party who doesn’t have to spend time in a car riding to the other location.
  • Your dress doesn’t have to cost an arm and a leg. I set a budget for my dress to be $400-$500. Trust me; it is possible to find a beautiful dress for that amount.
  • Opt for less expensive food dishes. You don’t need caviar and shrimp. Go for something simpler and less likely to break your bank.
  • Choose cupcakes instead of cake. Our cake was around $300 and that was the cheapest we found. However, I’m sure cupcakes are just as delicious and less costly.
  • You don’t need too much food. You don’t need fondue, dessert bar, smores bar and an open bar. Just one dessert option will suffice.
 Via Puckermob

My Husband And I Are Searching For Our Happiness

“It’s about $1,000 plus for an apartment in the north, so why don’t we look for places in the south?” my then-boyfriend asked me years ago.

We were searching for jobs in Tennessee – because I always wanted to live there.

So, he applied to a few jobs and boom, one day he got contacted, had two more interviews and obtained the job. We were off to embark on a new adventure.

Conveniently, we found an apartment, took all of our belongings and moved to Tennessee. It was a huge risk we took, but I think I was looking for happiness. Well, I think I was searching for several things.

I never did find them though.

I never felt like I belonged, there wasn’t much to do, my then-boyfriend and I constantly got into arguments and I didn’t make friends. People in the area kept telling me we’ll get used to living there, but we never did.

“You’ll be okay. It took me 6 months to feel settled. You’ll get there,” someone told me.

But, we lived there for a year and it still didn’t feel home to us.

Last April, my then-fiance lost his job and we were left with the decision to either ride it out or move back home.

We decided to temporarily move home because our wedding was taking place at the end of the year plus we needed to get back on our feet. However, both of us knew we wanted to be in the South. It was cheaper and the people were nicer.

I googled beautiful states in the South and landed on Charleston, SC.

Then, in December, he got a call about a job interview in Asheville, NC. The area was too expensive and we couldn’t find too many apartments. So, we rode around to see if there were other cities nearby we could live.

You should have seen us.

It was a sad story. 

We drove around Raleigh, Charlotte, Columbia, SC. We figured one of these cities would bring us a homey feeling. But, we never felt it. 

Then, we remembered Greenville, SC. We visited last April when one of my good friends offered to do our engagement shoot. We recalled feeling comfortable walking around the city, liking our surroundings and plus, we had a couple we knew!

Therefore, we’ve decided to choose Greenville.

Am I scared the same thing will happen again like Tennessee? Am I afraid to move away from everything I ever knew? Am I frightened to leave my family behind? I’d be lying if I said I didn’t. But, in life, you must take chances.

I just want to be happy. Is that so much to ask for?

I want to live in an inexpensive state that I don’t have to worry paying 1,000+ for an apartment. I want to make friends with people who are similar to me. I want us to enjoy ourselves.

Heck, I want us to really start our life together. We haven’t been able to enjoy our life as newlyweds because we’ve been too concerned with finding jobs and stressing about money.

So, it’s time to find our happiness and we’re going to great lengths to search for it.

Via Mogul

I Hope He Still Gives Me That Look Even When I’m Old And Gray

The man I love is lying at the end of the bed watching one of his favorite shows. He strokes his hair and squints at the screen.

“Put on your glasses, you keep squinting your eyes,” I say as I hand him his glasses. He smiles at me nonchalantly.

I stare at him for a few more minutes before I return back to writing. His back is facing me, so he doesn’t see me staring in his direction. I take a few more moments to look at the man I just married.

We’ve been married for almost 2 months. We’ve been together for over 3 years and we didn’t meet the conventional way, rather we met online.

I was against online dating and refused to try it, until my best friend convinced me. Long story short, I met my husband online and I don’t regret giving into something I wasn’t comfortable with doing.

I thank my best friend quite often for pushing me to create a profile on Okcupid. She was the one who told me it was okay to pursue online dating.

“It’s fun, trust me,” she said.

And, she was right.


“Will you always give me that look?” I ask my husband.

He smiles and says, “yes, of course.”

I just want to remember this moment before everything gets crazy, before kids come into the picture, before we purchase our first house, before we get old, before it’s the end of just the two of us.

“I’m scared that our love with change,” I say. “It may change, but I’ll always love you,” he responses with.

I just want him to always push the hair out of eyes, stroke my hair, hold me tight and cuddle me when I need it and most of all, love me after I’m pregnant. These are just fears of mine though.

Deep down, I know he will, but there’s always a part of me that’s scared of the changes that will happen in the years to come.

Even when I’m old and gray, I’m hoping he’ll love me just the same!

He kisses me on the forehead and hugs me tight. I never want him to stop doing that even when we have kids or even when my body changes.

We’re just starting our lives together and there will be lots of stuff we’re going to endure. But, at the end of the day, supporting each other will become a crucial part of our lives and I know we’ll be able to be there for each other no matter what!

Via Puckermob

We Went To Three Cities And A Cruise For Our Honeymoon Part 1

My husband hates flying, so we decided to take a road trip to visit Savannah, GA, Charleston, SC and Raleigh, NC. In-between, we went on a cruise to the (Amber Cove) Dominican Republic, St. Thomas & St. Maarten.

I was more excited about the cruise than anything else.

But, to my surprise, it was actually quite disappointing because we got motion sickness and we weren’t thrilled with the forms of entertainment as well as the food. Ick! After a few days, we were sick of the food.

I yearned to eat real food instead of buffets every day. I mean, it was nice to just get food whenever you wanted, but it was also dangerous because it was mostly processed and I feared gaining weight.

Let’s start with the cruise, which lasted 7 days.

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When we got to our room, we were greeted with the photo below – which was the sweetest thing ever!

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On the 2nd night, we dressed up for FORMAL NIGHT. Since it was our honeymoon, the crew members came over with the cake – shown below – and sang HAPPY HONEYMOON TO YOU.

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We did THREE excursions. The first was riding ATVS.

It was muddy and in the Dominican Republic. I let him drive because I was afraid. We got really muddy, but it was fun. We also drank.. a lot. I’m not used to drinking that much, but I just went with the flow.

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THIS IS KELVIN, THE TOUR GUIDE, MY HUSBAND & I.

Next was snorkeling in St. Thomas.

OMG.

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THE VIEW.

It was absolutely beautiful and snorkeling was so much fun.

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YEAH, YOU AHEAD AND SAY IT – WE LOOK LAMEEEE.

Next was a Sunset Cruise, which disappointed us because people were chatting, drinking and the captain didn’t even go toward the sunset. You would think she would considering it was the Sunset Cruise, right?

WRONG.

We went to a few fitness classes while on the boat, watched a movie, went in the hot-tub, swam, sunbathed and drank.

We decided that we aren’t CRUISE PEOPLE, but we wouldn’t have figured that out if we didn’t go, so it was a good experience.

This is just PART ONE of the #Alwaysn4evan Honeymoon.

Stay tuned for PART TWO.

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Just Because I’m Married Doesn’t Mean I’ll No Longer Be Independent

Let me start by saying, I’ve been married for 3 days and I absolutely love my husband!

I was overjoyed, excited and looking forward to the tie when we’d tie the knot. I’m happy to be his wife, but that doesn’t mean I’ll no longer be independent.

There are some couples that literally have to do everything. If the other person doesn’t go, neither will they. In my opinion, that’s no way to live.

You should be able to get up and go wherever the hell you want.

Please do not be one of those gals who needs their husband to go with them everywhere!

My bestie was talking about visiting Portland and I told her I’d like to go solo because I want a girls weekend. I do not need my husband to come with me. I am his wife, but I am also independent. I love being with him, but I also love my girl time.

I love going places with him, but I can also go anywhere by myself and so can he.

I interned in New York for over a year and I traveled nearly every day by myself. I did not need anyone to hold my hand while I found my way.

I can do things on my own and I will continue to be my own person.

Even though my last name will change and my identity will alter slightly, that has nothing to do with my independence. I’ll still be the same person.

When he passes away, I need to learn how to move on with my life and if I’m constantly up his ass and rely on him for every little thing, I’ll be screwed.

While I rely on him for certain things, it won’t be every single thing. Or else, I won’t know how to cope, how to be myself anymore.

He’s told me in the past that I’m all he needs.

I don’t agree with that though. Like I said, I love him with all my heart, but there are times when I want to hang with my girls and he understands that. But, he’ll still say that he’d be fine if he just had me.

But, I wouldn’t be because I need friends, family and other people because that’s just human nature.

I love him, but I will remain independent.

Via Puckermob

Through All The Negative, Remember There Will Always Be Love

“I hope one day I can find a love like yours,” one of my good friends said to me.

I told her that I know one day she’ll find her ‘prince charming,’ but it’s not just about being married. There are other kinds of love to appreciate like love between friends.

She was pertaining to having a husband, which I’m very much appreciative for.

I know that I’m unable to find a job in my career, I’m not at where ideally I’d like to be, and all of that mumbo-jumbo, but I’m forgetting the most important thing that I have – besides supportive parents on both sides – love.

I just got married about 3 weeks ago.

I keep neglecting the fact that I have someone that loves me no matter what. He never judges me and he’d support me no matter what. I don’t care if at 27 I’m not doing what I truly want. At the end of the day, I have love.

Don’t they say ‘love concurs all?’ I’d heard this phrase before.

As long as you have love and support around you, it shouldn’t matter that you don’t have much money, that you don’t have exactly what you want or anything else. Love is a powerful thing to have and it’s hard to find.

So, on those ‘down days,’ remember that you always have love around you.

This includes love from friends, family and your significant other.

In my case, I’m appreciative of the love I share with my husband, who does everything he can in order to make me happy. Despite not being able to find a job himself, he’s always there to bring me back up when I crawl into that deep hole.

My heart beats a mile a minute when our eyes meet and I melt when he kisses me on the forehead or when he puts his head on mine or on my chest.

Our love is real and sometimes I still cannot believe I found him.

But, love is strong and powerful and you mustn’t let it go. Whether it’s love for a friend, or significant other, it should never be taken for granted.  Therefore, just remember that love is all around us.

Via Puckermob

A Letter To My Future Hubby Three Days Before Our Wedding

Dear future husband,

As we get ready to say our “I do’s,” we need to remember a few things and never ever forget them.

We must always be kind. Always be kind and always care for each other, even when we get into huge fights, even when we have kids, even when we buy our first house, even through death and health issues.

We must always love each other. No matter what we do – excluding cheating of course, which would never happen – we must love one another until the day we die. We must remember how and why we fell in love in the first place.

Once kids are brought into this world, our lives will change. This does not mean we will love each other less, but things will certainly alter. Instead of just worrying about each other, we’ll have more on our plates.

We must always communicate. I know sometimes it’s hard to talk about everything, but we must always talk out our problems and issues so they don’t turn into something bigger.  We have to work through things and promise not to just shut the other person out.

We must always remember to make time for each other. When kids come into the picture, we still must remember to make time for a date night and never let our romance die. It’s extremely important and we mustn’t forget that!

We’ve had ups and downs these last three years, but we were always there for each other. We were always there to support and pick each other up when we fell down.

The biggest change in our lives was moving to Tennessee.

We made it! We accepted the challenge and passed the love test with flying colors.

I will never forget when you had your nose surgery. With tears streaming down your face, painful eyes, you looked at me and smiled. My heart hurt so badly for you that I couldn’t help but kiss you on your head. This is when you told me you truly knew I’d be your wife one day.

We both knew each other was special since day one.

You were my first love and I was yours. And, now, in 3 days, we’ll tie the knot. We will be husband and wife and a new chapter in our lives will begin.

Truth be told, I am scared shitless. I am afraid of change between us. But, it happens more often than not. My goal is to not let that happen.

I will never stop loving you. I will never stop caring for you. I will never stop supporting you. I will never stop communicating with you. I will never stop taking care of you. And, most of all, I will love you for the rest of my life, Brett Evans.

Via Puckermob

I’m Nervous, But So Ready To Get Married

I’m getting married in 3 days. Shit. Damn. F***.

This is really happening, isn’t it? This is real life, isn’t it?

It’s getting closer and closer every day. It’s feels like the longest few months of my life.  It seems like the day is never going to get here, but it’s just three days away.I’m nervous AF.

I’m nervous AF.

I’m sure you were when you got married. I’m sure you felt butterflies in your stomach when you thought about it. I bet you were apprehensive thinking about how much you wanted the day to go right.

I’m scared things are going to change.

“Your relationship changes once you tie the knot, I remember someone saying.

But, I don’t want it to change though – unless this “change” is in an even more positive direction.

What happens when we get tired of spending time with each other? Does that happen? Could that happen?

What happens if we grow apart?

These are questions that pop up in my mind, but I’m not going to dwell on them. I’m not going to focus on them. But, I am thinking about all these things though.

Marriage is a huge commitment. It’s not a joke. It is real and it is happening.

Is it normal to be kind of nervous?

I think about walking down the aisle and seeing his face. I’ll look into his eyes and probably lose all control. I won’t be able to control my emotions because he is my everything. He is my rock, my shoulder to lean on, and we’ve been through so much.

There’s no doubt he’s the one.

Once the wedding planning starts, everything starts to feel real. Once you begin trying on wedding dresses, it changes. It’s scary because this is the man you’re going to be with for the rest of your life. He sees you at your best and worst.

I’m nervous, but I’m so ready to do this. I’m so ready to marry him. I’m so ready to take this next step in our lives.

Via Puckermob